How Ending My Self Help Addiction Was My Catalyst (And How You Do It)


self help addiction

It was the year 2000, and I was at a party in the mansion of a millionaire entrepreneur I was working with. Whilst stood talking around his sparkling pool, he proceeded to tell me that I would become a millionaire. 13 years later, I was even more worse off – what happened..?

self help addiction

self help addiction

Quadrant For This Guide:
All Quadrants

Elements/Topics For This Guide:
ManUltro™ Overview, Self Help, Self Development

For a list of guides broken down into ALL 4 quadrants, scroll to the bottom right of this page.

PICTURE THE SCENE: I was in the company of 50 other wannabe millionaires, at a beautiful mansion with a pool, with the resident, charismatic millionaire as our host. We were there to pick his brains, share ideas, and to let our hair down.

The compliment he paid me was off the back of a talk I gave in front of everyone, that had seemingly gone down very well.

And his words would stay with me every day for the next decade and beyond, as motivation, and also vindication I was on the right path. When times were tough, I would recall his words to rejuvenate me and put me back on track.

I was filled with optimism and assuredness that I would make it.

But 13 years later, and clearly it hadn’t quite gone to plan. I was worse off than ever before, and not in a good place.

What could have happened to have taken me so far off the path?

Prefer to watch the video, or listen to the audio of this post? Scroll down further for the Skochy TV video/Skochy Radio podcast versions below…

Feature Download: Download the PDF of this monster and read it later/anywhere.
self help addiction

In fact, what followed was a long journey of failure.

What happened?

Why, if I was so filled with optimism and praise from successful millionaires (there were others along the way), was I failing to reach my goal?

And why did it take me 13 years to get anywhere?

The problem was that I didn’t know what the problem was. I’d spent 13 years telling everyone I knew that I was going to travel the world working from a laptop, and buy a house with a pool, on the beach.

And now I was starting to look deluded.

I’d gone into business with more than a few successful men who drove nice cars, and whose personalities didn’t seem too dissimilar from my own.

And I’d stuffed myself full of every success-orientated book, seminar, video and guru that I could find, and suffered the frustration of reading review-after-review of supposed fellow dream-chasers, who according to their glowing account had “put the information into action, and 3 weeks later were earning thousands per month”.

Was I missing something?

Why THEM and not me?

It wasn’t until I man-scored myself that I finally found out why.

Allow me to explain.


The Problem With Self-Help Material Today (And Tell Me You Haven’t Thought The Same Thing)…

You see, there are people who have been trying for three or four months or maybe a couple of years to make it, in whatever endeavour they’re trying to make it in. And then suddenly they do.

There are people who finally cracked the code after five years of hard work.


  1. I always say: I know nothing. Everything that comes out my mouth is my pure opinion/belief, molded from years of my own experiences in this ‘life’ thing. My beliefs have been known to change over time, as I refine them. I have an open mind.
  2. My philosophy is built on 5 pillars: 1. LOVE (love absolutely with joy, wonder and respect – reject what I don’t); 2. ACCEPTANCE (the world is as it is and always has been – I can only change myself); 3. PEACE (anti-confrontation/ bullying – negative energy doesn’t serve me); 4. FREEDOM (my life is completely in my own hands – vote with my feet); and 5. SUBJECTIVITY (every life-form sees their world from their own philosophy – noone can speak for me). My beliefs are therefore coloured thusly.
  3. Although I coach and teach, I don’t proclaim to be a self help guru. Most of the money I make is made from my business ventures, through my joint ventures, sales development, and sales coaching. I do coaching because I have a joy for helping people, and I love writing.
  4. I practise what I preach. I wouldn’t put anything up here that I didn’t do, or haven’t experienced. You can trust me!
  5. Whether through my articles, podcast, YouTube channel, our premium products, the events I speak at, or indeed my 17+ years experience in business, sales, marketing and coaching, my #1 goal is to help you to become a more successful, high-achieving man.

  6. Finally, by reading this, you agree to the Terms And Conditions, and Disclaimer.

Skochy – The Musical Salesman

And then there are people like me who after more than 10 years were still trying to get the plane to take-off.

And it doesn’t help people like us to read reviews of people who became successful with a self-help product within a few weeks or months of finishing the course.

Or learning that the guru selling the product was a successful stockbroker, businessman, etc., etc., before doing the thing that lead him to create the product he’s selling, or that he already had a lot of money.

How were people like us supposed to relate to someone like this? And if that wasn’t enough, if their product is selling for thousands of dollars you think to yourself, how am I supposed to afford this? If I COULD afford this I wouldn’t be in the situation where I needed to buy it in the first place.

And I would think to myself how am I ever going to become successful if I can’t even get my hands on the tiniest bit of capital to invest in myself?

(Note: If you’ve been suffering the same, I’ve put together a bonus resource at the end of this post with instructions on how to start fixing this.)

When you are 10+ years unsuccessful, you start to think that there must be something fundamentally wrong with yourself or what you’re trying to do. This is what happened to me, and this is why I decided it was time to take a good look at myself.

Because I mean think about it, if you have been trying for more than 10 years to make money for instance, or to become a success at something, and you are still a long way away, then surely you have to acknowledge there is something deeper wrong.

I got to work, and like a mad scientist, I started to take myself apart and rate myself in every conceivable aspect of my self that personal success might be contingent upon.

I’d always been a deep thinker, and philosophised upon everything to its core, and what came out over the next few months was the result of that.

…if you have been trying for more than 10 years to make money for instance, or to become a success at something, and you are still a long way away, then surely you have to acknowledge there is something deeper wrong.

It was brilliant.

It was huge.

It was deep.

But more than anything, it made sense. And I finally could see why I had been failing to hit my ultimate goal all these years.

I had finally diagnosed myself and come up with my own prognosis.

It was a map of me, a self development scoresheet, that exposed all my strengths and weaknesses, so that I could finally improve them.

I had answers now. A plan. And now I could finally take steps to build those weak areas and start to hone in on my target. And it’s no exaggeration when I say that everything I’ve achieved since then is down to scoring myself with my system.

At first, this was all meant to be for myself. But when I started to tell people about it, they said that I should put it out there to help others. And so that’s why I’m here.


Here’s The Point…

I want you to get something out of this article and blog. And I want that thing to be good.

If you’re a man between 30-65, and you’ve been trying to become a success at something for 10+ years, then this will help you.

I’m going to tell you why you haven’t made it, and what to do to fix that. Right here. For free.

Because this blog isn’t how I make my money. As much as I love writing, coaching, and philosophy, the point of this blog isn’t to make money – at least directly. I very much hope it will verify my authority and ability to help people with the services I DO charge for, for those that come here looking for my help.

So I expect the following information to leave you better than I found you. And if I do that, then I’ve won. And if you choose to hire me for something, then great.

self help addiction
How many self help books do you need to read before you start succeeding?

On that note, I won’t go into detail here what I do. But for your information there are 3 ways I make my money mainly:

  • Getting businesses more money
  • Sales training for individuals and businesses
  • Success coaching for underachieving men

If you want to know more, there’s a load of links at the bottom of every page that’ll tell you everything you need to know.

You’ll see that the blog is a small part of this website, as it has been by and large a brochure site for years, selling my services. The blog is new, so you may find some scaffolding I’m still in the process of taking down, as well as sample/placeholder text – ignore this.

As far as my journey goes, again, I won’t go into detail in this article. But if you want to know more, then check out my About page here.

Over the course of this blog, you’ll get to know me. But this article and the following series of articles, I want to be a primer in my ‘system’.


Prefer Videos Or Audios To Reading? We’ve Got You Covered! (I Love This!)

self help addictionWith every blog post from From Zero To Hero Five Zeros, we turn it into a video and an audio podcast episode called Skochy’s Blog Post Read-Through, where I read through and discuss the blog post over a cuppa, for our Skochy TV YouTube channel, and our Skochy Radio podcast shows respectively.

The video version goes out live via Facebook Live, so head to the Facebook Page and LIKE that, so you’ll be notified every time an episode is going to air (we do a Q&A at the end of every show, it’s really awesome).

The video for this show is below. For all videos from the YouTube channel so far, see the YouTube channel over here. Scroll down a bit for the podcast audio version.

self help addictionAnd here’s the podcast audio version, which is the same as the video above, except you can’t see me ‘cos it’s audio, see? (Perfect if you don’t like my face.)

CLICK HERE to listen to this show on iTunes.

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CLICK HERE to stream the podcast for this show.

RIGHT CLICK HERE to download this show as an mp3 (right click the link, and choose “Save As”).

For all subscription/listening options for the podcast show, head over here.


I Hope You’re Ready For This (This Is NOT For The Faint Of Heart)…

Unlike most self development programmes, there will be a lot of work involved for you. But I promise you, it will be worth it.

Self development programmes and books/seminars/videos. You name it I’ve probably read it. The thing is, they are all generic, and holistic.

They give you general, universal ideas and steps to become a millionaire, but how can they tell you what you need to do if they don’t know what’s wrong with you?

It’s like a doctor prescribing medicine before diagnosing you. Clearly, there’s a problem if only a small percentage of people who take self-help courses are actually making it and becoming successful.

Surely the fact alone that there are millions of people who never make it, who fill success forums swamping them with questions about how to become successful, indicates that there is a problem with self development and success materials.

The evidence is clear: Until you know what’s wrong with you, you can’t fix yourself.

Until you know what's wrong with you, you can't fix yourself.

Think about it. Think about all the self development books, videos, courses that you’ve gone through, thinking that their promises of fame and fortune would come true.

They didn’t, did they? You’re in exactly the same position you were in before you did them, right? Or maybe even worse.

And this is where I found myself. I had spent so much time and money on new methods and techniques, and wasted so much hot air telling people THIS WAS IT, that I was worse off than before I’d begun. Does this describe you?

So with that said, let’s continue.

Now if you’re anything like me then you probably have also read most of the recommended self development books out there. I want you to now forget everything you’ve ever learnt from these books.

I want you to empty your mind so it’s clear for what’s coming up over the next few articles. Because if you don’t, then you will have conflicting information.

I want you to understand that you can’t fix yourself using the information that you’ve learned up until now in self development.

So hold onto your hat, because we’re going to go deep here…


Are You Ready To Get Started?

Okay, that’s enough preamble. I think you get the message. So let me tell you how I’m going to help you.

Over the next series of articles, I’m going to start getting you to evaluate yourself in more ways than you ever thought were possible.

I’m going to have you look deep at yourself and start finding out what it is that has been holding you back all these years.

Then I’m going to tell you how you can start fixing these things to start becoming the man that will earn (notice I didn’t say ATTRACT ugh!) the things into your life that you really want.

It won’t always be pretty, and it won’t always be fun. But what it WILL be is honest.

It will take time, and maybe sometimes, you may decide it will cost you money to fix some of the things quicker. That’s just the nature of the beast. But if you don’t have money, the good news is you can just use good ol’ time to start fixing yourself.

self help guide
A standard list of self help stuff they say will ‘fix’ you

Myself, at the beginning, when I didn’t have money, I didn’t have any choice: I HAD to do it the free and SLOW way. But sooner or later, you start getting momentum, and you start getting your hands on money, and you can start shaving time off your mission, by outsourcing a few things here and there.

Things happen quicker, and then you start finding more money, and you invest more, as you gain more leverage.

But if you’re flat broke, don’t worry – that’s exactly where I started.

My journey has been a long one, and if you’re still reading now then I’m going to assume that yours has been too. And I’m going assume also that you’re ready to start getting something back from all the years you’ve put in so far.

I’m going to assume that you’re ready to start succeeding and to start hitting some of those goals that you set yourself for all these years.

So I’m going to leave you now with something to be getting on with until the first big lesson.


Conclusion + What You Need To Do Next (Prepare Yourself, Because From The Next Article, It’s Going To Get VERY Interesting For You)…

So there you have it.

The point of this article was to give you the background of what this blog is about, to discuss the problems I had that you probably are having too, and to introduce to you the process by which I can help you.

Below is an exercise that I want you to do that will prepare you for the meat and potatoes that are coming in the next article. I couldn’t just launch straight into the programme because it wouldn’t make sense to you so I needed to give you some instruction first.

In doing the exercise below, you will ensure you are part of this programme, and you will receive every issue of this blog.

This blog is called FROM ZERO TO HERO FIVE ZEROS. It is my day-to-day, ongoing, public journal, chronicling my experiments in selling, marketing, business, love, success, life, my fails – and of course my wins on the way to that five zero monthly income.

This blog is new, and I’m launching it with this series of articles aimed at helping you to turn your life around.

The series is called the ManUltro™ Value System Primer Series. That name won’t mean anything to you yet.

So that’s why I want you to tune-in for the next article (available here for after you’ve completed the below), because that’s when it will kick off, and where everything I’ve said so far will start making sense.

So, in the meantime, in preparation, I want you to take the following exercise


Your ‘homework’ begins from step 3, but make sure you do the first two steps before…

STEP 1: Rate This Article (Be Honest)



STEP 2: Give It A Quick Share


The following four steps is where the work begins (and the transformation starts). You’ll find these steps on the download page of your goodies also…


STEP 3: Book A FREE Failure Causation Exploratory Video Coaching Session (Valued At $250 – Okay, I Have Officially Lost It)

I NEVER give FREE coaching sessions, so this is crazy. I thought to myself, what can I give away in my first post, and I thought, hey, let’s start at the top.

This is a ONE-OFF as a celebration to mark the first blog post of the new era. It’s only 30 minutes, but we’ll cover enough to start you on the right path.

This pre-value-assessment, exploratory, video coaching session – aimed at ambitious men between 30-65 – will aim to:

  • Begin uncovering what’s been holding you back for so long
  • We’ll discuss the ManUltro™ Value System, and how it’s the key to you finally moving forward (I’ll be telling you all about this in the next post)
  • I’ll take you through the process of ‘man-scoring’ yourself, to see what’s broken, and what needs to be fixed
  • Also, I’ll tell you what you need to do next immediately after the call, to keep the momentum going

Click below and it will open up a download box, so you can book your session:

self development addiction

self development addiction


STEP 4: Put It Into Action NOW

Strike while the iron’s hot, while you have the enthusiasm and momentum. THIS IS IMPORTANT. Do it before that monkey climbs on your back again. Book the session there and then, so it’s done.


STEP 5: Come Back And Tell Us How It Worked For You

Tell everyone your good news by clicking here (takes you to the comments box below).


STEP 6: Congratulate Yourself On Being A Master Of The Universe

Yeah, that’s right.

Well, that’s me. I hope this helped you to start fixing your own situation, and I’ll see you again soon for another episode of From Zero To Hero Five Zeros.

Thanks for reading, and adding to the adventure of my journey.

To prosperity,

The Musical Salesman (since 2000)
“mecum et incipio et finio”
MD/Prosperity Investment Broker/Musician,
Skochy Prosperity Investment Ltd –
“Because Your Prosperity Is The Greatest Investment”