How To Uncover Why You’ve Failed As A Man (Tool To Fix It TODAY)


self development

It happened to me sat outside the trendy Rose & Crown pub in leafy Warwick. I was drained. I’d just poured my heart out to my friend, laying-out my entire philosophy. And then she said the thing that changed everything. Suddenly, I was invigorated. What did she say to me exactly..?

self development

This is part ONE in our ongoing series, The ManUltro™ Value System Primer Series. Earlier posts can be found here.

self development

Quadrant For This Guide:
All Quadrants, Emotional (Quadrant 1), Mental (Quadrant 2), Physical (Quadrant 3), Socioemotional (Quadrant 4)

Elements/Topics For This Guide:
ManUltro™ Value System Primer Series, ManUltro™ Overview, Self Help, Self Development

For a list of guides broken down into ALL 4 quadrants, scroll to the bottom right of this page.

WE MUST HAVE been talking for hours. I must have been talking for hours. She’d just been listening patiently.

It was the first time I’d verbalised my philosophy. Up until that point, it had just been scribbled on scraps of paper, documented on feverishly-typed online files, and graffitied on the walls of my mind.

But today – today, it was time to release the beast.

So I did. And it felt good. It felt good to share this with another human being. To find out if I was actually crazy or not for having these thoughts.

Ideas become different animals when they’re verbalised, don’t they? Thoughts are suddenly exposed for criticism. Private opinions are open for debate. My philosophy had finally been laid bare.

On the contrary, though, my friend was amazed and impressed with everything I’d said. And it was at this point, as I paused and gasped for air, that she said to me what would start a chain reaction. A snowball that couldn’t be stopped.

“You should share that with people”.

Such innocent words. But by saying that, she’d inadvertently plonked a humongous stack of figurative work onto my mental desk.

And now the real work really would begin.

So what is this philosophy I’m talking about, exactly?

Prefer to watch the video, or listen to the audio of this post? Scroll down further for the Skochy TV video/Skochy Radio podcast versions below…

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self development

How many self help books, videos, seminars, etc., etc., would you say you’ve consumed? Ten, twenty, dozens, hundreds?

If you’re anything like me, it’s probably more like hundreds.

And how many self help materials do you think actually helped you in the way you wanted them to? How many stuck with you? How many were useful beyond killing a few hours down-time?

Think about that…

If you read my last post, you’ll remember I spoke about the problem with self help material today. It’s all very generic and holistic and tries to fix a problem without first finding out what the problem is.

It’s like a doctor prescribing medicine without first diagnosing the ailment.

The problem is, that no personal challenges are created equal. And with it, one man’s challenges are another man’s meat and drink.

So the generic, feel-good advice given in these books and videos is pretty much useless. I guess if it’s motivational, then sometimes it can give you the needed momentum to move past a problem, with enthusiasm alone.

But this will only get you so far.

After years of voraciously consuming one self help volume after-the-next, with the net result my feeling jaded, I sensed this, and I reasoned I was wasting my time.

And this is what lead to me creating my philosophy.

Allow me to explain.


My Problem With Self Development Materials (And Tell Me You Don’t Feel The Same Way)…

Before I go any further, you must know that the point of me sharing all of this is because I believe it will help you. And if it helps you in any way near the way it helps me on a daily basis, then I’ve achieved what I set out to do.

Many of the self development materials I devoured, build their philosophy on splitting your self, your energy, into different areas. Usually, it’s mental, financial, emotional, spiritual, material, social, etc.


  1. I always say: I know nothing. Everything that comes out my mouth is my pure opinion/belief, molded from years of my own experiences in this ‘life’ thing. My beliefs have been known to change over time, as I refine them. I have an open mind.
  2. My philosophy is built on 5 pillars: 1. LOVE (love absolutely with joy, wonder and respect – reject what I don’t); 2. ACCEPTANCE (the world is as it is and always has been – I can only change myself); 3. PEACE (anti-confrontation/ bullying – negative energy doesn’t serve me); 4. FREEDOM (my life is completely in my own hands – vote with my feet); and 5. SUBJECTIVITY (every life-form sees their world from their own philosophy – noone can speak for me). My beliefs are therefore coloured thusly.
  3. Although I coach and teach, I don’t proclaim to be a self help guru. Most of the money I make is made from my business ventures, through my joint ventures, sales development, and sales coaching. I do coaching because I have a joy for helping people, and I love writing.
  4. I practise what I preach. I wouldn’t put anything up here that I didn’t do, or haven’t experienced. You can trust me!
  5. Whether through my articles, podcast, YouTube channel, our premium products, the events I speak at, or indeed my 17+ years experience in business, sales, marketing and coaching, my #1 goal is to help you to become a more successful, high-achieving man.

  6. Finally, by reading this, you agree to the Terms And Conditions, and Disclaimer.

Skochy – The Musical Salesman

But this didn’t sit right with me. And it didn’t fit the philosophy I was developing at the time.

Why devote a part of your life to ‘material’ stuff? Why isolate things in this area to a separate category. As if it’s a guilty pleasure that shouldn’t be associated with the ‘deeper’, spiritual, or emotional sides?

The same with financial goals. Why are they a separate category? Surely they are incidental to your career or profession?

I’m not saying that what came before me was wrong, and what I have is the truth. Far from it.

My philosophy is just a very different way of looking at things, is all. And I wouldn’t be sharing it with you if it hadn’t completely turned my life around.

Stay with me.

Remember when I said, in the last article, how I’d been trying to become successful for 10+ years, but was no nearer? I think it was my lack of success that drove me to start examining myself, to see what was wrong with me.

(Note: I’ve put together the resource of resources at the end of this post that will give you a step-by-step process to put all this motion.)

Why were other people achieving success so much quicker? What was wrong with me? And my introspection led to deeper, philosophical thoughts, which lead to complete analyses of my self.

Which led me to discover what was wrong with me. I’ll get to this later.

So, after some long months of introspection, I started to put all my thoughts in order. And what I ended up with, was what I now call The ManUltro™ Value System.

And the concept is that everything in a man’s life, can be neatly placed into one of four quadrants. And the idea is that, as men, we should be constantly levelling-up these four quadrants – as well as keeping them balanced – to achieve the tasty goodness that life has to offer.

NOTE: I think I should give a hat-tip to Stephen Covey and his classic, The 7 Habits Of Highly Effective People, here. I’m not sure, but I think this may have been where I got my inspiration for the ‘quadrant’ thinking.

The 7 Habits Of Highly Effective PeopleAND, he talks about emotional, mental, spiritual, and physical goals. Not quite how my quadrants are labelled, as I didn’t think it was accurate for my quadrant concept. But it was certainly an inspiration.

Not only that, but his whole planning and self development curriculum was a massive influence on me. You can get his book at Amazon by clicking here. Although it’s off-topic here, it is a VERY good book on planning, and managing your time. It will give you the background of what my system is influenced from.

Anyway, let me give a very quick overview of these quadrants before I go into further detail below.

Everything in a man’s life can be neatly placed into one of four quadrants. And the idea is that, as men, we should be constantly levelling-up these four quadrants

First, there’s the ’emotional quadrant’ – this is the driver of everything, the passionate, desire-seeking, goal-driven, carnal animal.

Then there’s the ‘mental quadrant’, which is the cool, rational, head of operations, the ultimate decision-maker of everything the emotional quadrant says it wants.

Next up is the ‘physical quadrant’, the vehicle that carries us around. Without this, we can’t go anywhere or do the things the emotional quadrant wants to do that the mental quadrant has permitted. This is why we look after it.

Finally, there’s the ‘socioemotional quadrant’. As human beings, we are social animals, and true happiness lies in connecting with others. This is the quadrant that makes that happen.

When I organised my thoughts and ideas in this way, it just seemed to fit so nicely.

Further than this, each quadrant is made-up of six virtues. And each virtue is comprised of modules and elements. And these elements and modules can be rated out of ten. By rating these elements and modules out of ten, you get an overall score out of ten for that virtue.

Which then gives you a rating out of ten for the quadrant. Which then ultimately gives you a master rating out of ten, which we call your value score. And the philosophy is that your value score is very telling, in that it effectively rates you out of ten as a man.

And of course, the higher that rating, the better your life.

It sounds pretty cold, yes. But that’s why I feel it’s so important. Nothing out there does this.

Every other self development resource just dances around the problem, and gives you a bunch of generic advice and a handful of platitudes, and sends you on your way.

It’s like I said before. This system and philosophy gives you an actual diagnosis that you can use to finally realise why you are where you are. A score that reveals why you’ve been getting what you’ve been getting all these years.

Imagine what you could do with that information.

Just know that it will be revealing once you rate yourself for the first time. You may not be happy with what you find. You may even be upset, initially.

But with this information, you can finally start to address the deep-rooted problems that have stunted your progress in life.

Because the higher the score, the better the life.

And when I analysed myself for the first time, based on this philosophy, when I man-scored myself for the first time, let’s just say it was pretty sobering for me. I came out as a three out of ten.

Ouch. Imagine that.

I’d been carrying-on down the same road for over ten years, expecting things to get better for me, without ever knowing why I was failing.

But to finally discover where I was weak, and why I’d been failing for so long – wow. This finally gave me the answers I’d been looking for.

And you will find the same when you come to scoring yourself for the first time.

But for now, let’s dive into these four quadrants, and make some sense of this. Then, later, I’ll give you the tool based on this system – that I use myself, daily, that will finally lift the lid on where you’re blocked.

And this will give you the vision to fix these weak areas, and finally begin moving forward with your life.


Introducing The EMOTIONAL Quadrant (The Young At Heart Will Relate To This One)…

self developmentThe first quadrant is the EMOTIONAL quadrant. And there’s a reason why it’s the first quadrant.

The EMOTIONAL quadrant is the passionate, red, deep-driven quadrant. It’s the quadrant with the fire under the belly. It’s your deep-seated, most-wanted goals, passions, hobbies and desires (although not sexual desires – that’s another quadrant).

It’s the animal in you. It’s the kid screaming at the top of his lungs what he wants most and will do anything to get. Left to its own devices, it’s the quadrant that wants for nothing, and to hell with the consequences.

The kid in the sweet shop. The bull in the China shop. Call it what you will, this quadrant doesn’t care. This quadrant isn’t paid to care. That’s another quadrant’s job. This quadrant be paid to dream, and that’s all he do.

Let loose. Day dream. Dream as if you’ll live forever; live as if you’ll die today. What you would do if you knew you couldn’t fail. And all that jazz.

self development
James Dean said it best – this is the emotional quadrant to a ‘T’

This is the quadrant tasked with finding and living your purpose. Living with passion. Travel and adventure. Laughing out loud. It’s all here.

It’s also the quadrant involved with anything relaxation and taking it easy. Putting your feet up and taking it all in. Calmness. Creativity. Meditation. Feeling free. Anything that’s good for the ‘soul’.

Anything close to the heart is this quadrant’s domain.

To be more precise, it deals with things like making money doing what you love. Living your dream lifestyle. Energising your life with hobbies and fun stuff. Developing a joy for life. All the old favourites.

And these are all things that this quadrant rates you on. And if you’re not strong in these areas, it gives you ways to fix them

But put this reckless quadrant in the driver’s seat, and wave goodbye to all you hold dear. Because a driver this quadrant ain’t.


Prefer Videos Or Audios To Reading? We’ve Got You Covered! (I Love This!)

self developmentWith every blog post from From Zero To Hero Five Zeros, we turn it into a video and an audio podcast episode called Skochy’s Blog Post Read-Through, where I read through and discuss the blog post over a cuppa, for our Skochy TV YouTube channel, and our Skochy Radio podcast shows respectively.

The video version goes out live via Facebook Live, so head to the Facebook Page and LIKE that, so you’ll be notified every time an episode is going to air (we do a Q&A at the end of every show, it’s really awesome).

The video for this show is below. For all videos from the YouTube channel so far, see the YouTube channel over here. Scroll down a bit for the podcast audio version.

self developmentAnd here’s the podcast audio version, which is the same as the video above, except you can’t see me ‘cos it’s audio, see? (Perfect if you don’t like my face.)

CLICK HERE to listen to this show on iTunes.

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self developmentCLICK HERE to listen to this show on TuneIn.

CLICK HERE to stream the podcast for this show.

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For all subscription/listening options for the podcast show, head over here.


Introducing The MENTAL Quadrant (Welcome To The Driver Of YOU)…

self developmentThe MENTAL quadrant is the driver. That’s right. While the EMOTIONAL quadrant is saying, “I wanna do this, and I wanna do that!”, the MENTAL quadrant is the one weighing it all up to see what’s feasible, before saying ‘Yes’ or ‘No’.

Yes siree, the MENTAL quadrant is the cool-headed, blue, decision-making quadrant. It’s the calm-under-pressure, rational member that every team needs.

Without the mental quadrant to oversee things, and make the final decisions, the emotional quadrant would see to it that everything ended in chaos.

The mental quadrant is the manager. The boss. The captain. So whereas the emotional quadrant takes care of the exciting and fun stuff to do, the mental quadrant is the one tasked with self improvement.

It’s the skills quadrant, where most of the things that need to be worked on – to be able to achieve the life you want – will be improved and fixed. The mind is a muscle, remember, and it needs as much exercise as the body. Just DIFFERENT exercise.

Your value score is very telling, in that it effectively rates you out of ten as a man

So the mental quadrant deals with growing things like self-esteem, self-confidence, self-discipline, and anything related to how you feel about yourself.

It increases your leadership skills and likeability by improving your assertiveness, social intelligence, skill with women, integrity, communication skills, your charisma and your wit.

It’s the brain workshop that exercises your brain power to sharpen your memory, your powers of logical deduction and lateral thinking, your sense of reason and wisdom, and has the responsibility of moulding your philosophy.

It takes care of anything finance, profession and business-related by increasing your business acumen and your money management skills. And it teaches you how to sell, and how to market.

And it deals with survival skills. Not always needed in today’s world. But nonetheless, they are skills that every man would benefit from.

More specifically, it will teach you things like how to drastically increase your income. How to inspire people to follow you. How to develop unstoppable confidence. How to attract and keep women. How to get more done. And loads more.

Between them, the emotional and mental quadrants will discover what you want most in your life, at the same time as making it possible to achieve these things.

But there is another quadrant that will need to have a hand in how things happen. Because there’s one resource that we all need if we’re going to live the life of our dreams.

And that resource is time. Because without time, we have nothing. So our aim should be to ensure we have as much time as possible to attain and live that life of our dreams.

And how do we do this?


Introducing The PHYSICAL Quadrant (Read On To Discover Why It’s So Important To Look After Your Body)…

self developmentSee, the only way we can increase the time we have to do these things is by taking care of the vehicle that decides not only how much time we have, but more importantly, when our time is up. And by vehicle, I mean:

Our body.

You’ve probably heard it said that your body is a temple. Your body is all you have, in fact. Don’t take care of your body, and you’ll soon find out how scarce time is.

The PHYSICAL quadrant is the evergreen, green, vehicular quadrant. It’s the thing that’s going to take you places. It’s like a car. You need your car to take you around and drive you to work to earn money to live.

The bare minimum, you need to feed your car fuel. If you don’t, then you’re going nowhere. But on top of this. You need to be maintaining your car, so it lasts for as long as it can before you have to buy a new one.

self development
Is this your body right now? Jeez, okay, the physical quadrant has got some work to do

It’s the same principle with your body. Except you only get ONE body. So you’d better take good care of it.

But it’s not just the thing to take you around. It’s the thing that’s going to protect you if there’s trouble. Every man should know how to defend himself, physically, if he needs to. The physical quadrant teaches you how to do this.

And just as the kind of car – and the state it’s in – can broadcast to people where you’re at in life, your body can, too. Drive a beat-up, old piece of crap, and you’ll get a certain reaction from people. Drive a clean, sexy sports car, and you’ll get quite another. So building a sexy body – that’s here too.

And just as the way you drive your car speaks volumes about your personality – timidly, reckless, confidently – the way you walk, stand, and hold yourself will do the same. The physical quadrant will address this.

So the physical quadrant is in charge of vitality, temperance, endurance, body strength, power, flexibility, posture, self-defence, attractiveness, grooming, style and fashion, physique and sleep.

And specifically, it is tasked with things like building a beautiful, masculine body. It is in charge of dressing like a celebrity, optimising your diet, winning friends and women with strong body language, and lots more.

So, you have the emotional quadrant, the mental quadrant, and the physical quadrant. You have the excitable emotional quadrant listing all the fun stuff it wants to do.

You have the mental quadrant calming it down and making the final decisions. And then you have the physical quadrant as the thing that’s going to take you where you want to go.

Now you just need some travel companions to share all this with. That’s where our final quadrant comes in.


Introducing The SOCIOEMOTIONAL Quadrant (Now You’ll See Why It’s So Important To Look After Those You Love)…

self developmentSo if the body is the vehicle, the mind is the driver, the heart is the kid shouting where he wants to go, then this quadrant is the people you share the journey with. Beautiful eh?

That’s right, the SOCIOEMOTIONAL quadrant is anything to do with other human beings. Those you know and love, as well as those you’ll never meet.

And not just human beings. ANYTHING with a pulse, in fact. On land, in the air, and in the sea. The SOCIOEMOTIONAL quadrant will take care of the relationships with the people and animals you meet on your journey, again, as well as those you’ll never meet.

And not just humans and animals. ALL life forms. Anything that grows and breathes. The trees, the flowers, the earth itself. Indeed, this quadrant is tasked with leaving your world better than you found it.

The socioemotional quadrant is the warm, orange, social/bonding quadrant. It’s the one with a passion to serve, to protect, and to love. As human beings, we are social creatures, with the capacity to want to connect with those other life forms around us.

self development
The socioemotional quadrant will teach you how to love everyone and everything

It’s the quadrant that wants someone to love romantically. It’s the one that loves family. It’s the one that loves animals. It’s the one that wants to meet people and make friends.

It’s the one that wants to smell the flowers. It’s the one that wants to help people. It’s the one that wants to take care of the planet.

It’s the good guy. It’s the ultimate travelling companion, that everyone and everything wants to be around and to love.

So the socioemotional quadrant deals with all things love, romance, family, friendship, sex. It is the domain of brotherhood, networking, community, courtesy, gentlemanners, charity, justice, teaching and coaching.

And specifically, it teaches you how to have better relationships. How to attract women and/or keep them. How to have better sex. How to serve the community and make the world a better place.

And tonnes more.

So there you have it. Four quadrants. All with a job to do. All balanced. All taking care of many things. And all need taking care of them.

And that job is yours. Because take care of the quadrants, and they’ll take care of you.


Conclusion + What You Need To Do Next (For The First Time EVER, I’m Sharing The Tool I Use For Myself Daily)…

And there you go. That’s my four-quadrant philosophy. Years in the making. And released for the first time here in this blog post.

The point of me telling you about this wasn’t to impress you. The point was to try, ultimately to help you. As I said before, I wouldn’t have gone to all this trouble to share it with you if I didn’t think it could really help you.

Remember, I created this to help me. And it certainly did that, and then some. This is the system I use every day.

And it’s because I truly think it could help you, that I’m releasing this methodology for the first time today. So please, use it wisely.

But this post was just the preview. The tool I’ve added below is the money. If the blurb above was the philosophy behind all this, then the tool below is the actual meat and potatoes.

The tool I’ve added below is called the ManUltro™ Value Scoresheet. It’s free for you to download, and it will put everything I’ve spoken about above into context.

It’s a tool that, once you start using it, will start giving you some answers as to why things haven’t been working out for you.

I’m telling you when you man-score yourself for the first time, it will be like a cloud has lifted.

And, armed with this information, from the next article in our ManUltro™ Value System Primer Series, we’ll start breaking down all the elements that make up each quadrant, and how you can start to grow and improve each one.

And the next article starts with the EMOTIONAL quadrant. We’ll look at exactly what it is comprised of, and I’ll give you some ways you can start to really home-in on those weak points, and start improving yourself.

You won’t want to miss that.

But without further ado, allow me to present to you, the ManUltro™ Value Scoresheet.


Your ‘homework’ begins from step 3, but make sure you do the first two steps before…

STEP 1: Rate This Article (Be Honest)



STEP 2: Give It A Quick Share


The following four steps is where the work begins (and the transformation starts). You’ll find these steps on the download page of your goodies also…


STEP 3: Download The ManUltro™ Value Scoresheet (Valued At $100) Below

Inside, you’ll be able to:

  • Be allowed to play with very the tool I used for years, that was to be the prototype of the ManUltro™ Value System’s cornerstone tool as it is now
  • Assess and score you in a way you’ve likely never been scored before, to see what’s broken, and what needs to be fixed
  • Highlight the areas and parts of YOU that are weak – as well as strong
  • Begin uncovering the reasons why you’ve been held back for so long
  • Also, we’ll tell you what you need to do next immediately after scoring yourself, to keep the momentum going (key to you finally moving forward)

Click below and it will open up a download box:

self development

self development addiction


STEP 4: Put It Into Action NOW

Strike while the iron’s hot, while you have the enthusiasm and momentum. THIS IS IMPORTANT. Do it before that monkey climbs on your back again.


STEP 5: Come Back And Tell Us How It Worked For You

Come back and gloat freely, by clicking here (takes you to the comments box below).


STEP 6: Congratulate Yourself On Being A Master Of The Universe

Yeah, that’s right.

And, relax. As always, I hope this helped you think about your philosophy as well anything self development related, and I’ll see you again soon for another episode of From Zero To Hero Five Zeros.

Thanks for reading, and adding to the adventure of my journey.

To prosperity,

The Musical Salesman (since 2000)
“mecum et incipio et finio”
MD/Prosperity Investment Broker/Musician,
Skochy Prosperity Investment Ltd –
“Because Your Prosperity Is The Greatest Investment”